One girl went to the preacher and confessed her sin.
有个女孩向神父告解她所犯的罪………
Girl: Father, I have sinned.
女孩:神父,我有罪。
Preacher: What did you do, little girl?
神父:孩子,你犯了什麽罪呢?
Girl: Yesterday, I called a man a "son of a Bitch."
女孩:昨天,我骂了某个男人一句:「你这个狗娘养的!」
Preacher: Why? What did he do to you?
神父:为什麽?他对你做了什麽吗?
Girl: He touched my breast.
女孩:他……他摸我的胸部。
Preacher: You mean like this? (The guy did it.)
神父:你是说像这样子吗?(神父伸手摸女孩的胸部)
Girl: (A little shy from the touch) Yes.
女孩:(因为神父的举动而有一些害羞)嗯……是的。
Preacher: That's no reason to call him that.
神父:只是这样子的话你没有理由骂他啊。
Girl: But he also took off my cloth.
女孩:但是……他又把我的衣服脱掉……
Preacher: You mean like this? (He did it again.)
神父:你是说像这样子吗?(神父动手脱掉女孩的衣服)
Girl: Yes, that's what he did.
女孩:是的,是这样子没错。
Preacher: That's still no reason to call him that.
神父:可是这样子你还是没有理由骂他啊。
Girl: And he put his you-know-what into my you-know-what...
女孩:然後……他把他的……那个……放到我的……那个……里面……
Preacher: (evil laugh...) You mean like this? (And you-know-what)
神父:(奸笑貌)你是说像这样子吗?(神父和女孩就那个那个了)
Girl: (After a few minutes...) Ugh... Yeah, that's what he did...
女孩:(数分钟後)喔……是的……就是这样子………
Preacher: My dear girl, that's still no reason to call him a...
神父:我亲爱的孩子,就算是这样你还是没有理由骂他「你这个………」
江青回见外宾,找了一个翻译。要求他要严格安她的意思翻,不许走样。
外宾一见到江青,立马拍马屁:"Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful".
翻译照翻,江青心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下:"哪里,哪里"。
翻译不敢怠慢,把江青的话翻成英文:"where?where?"
外宾一楞,还有这样的人,追问哪里漂亮的,干脆马屁拍到底:
"everywhere,everywhere".
翻译:"你到处都很漂亮。"
江青更高兴了,但总是要客气一下:"不见得,不见得"。
翻译赶紧翻成英文:"you are not allowed to
see, you are not allowed to see."
一對夫婦結婚多年了 但是因為先生那話兒不行 使 終無法享受" the happiness of
fish and water " 一日太太終於忍不住 強拉著先生去看婦產科醫生 在徹底診斷之?
?醫生很有把握的說 : 只要吃完我的藥 保證能享受 " the happiness of fish and
water " 聽完之後 太太二話不說 拉著先生奔往藥局配藥 可是酒醉的藥劑師把 1
匙看做 11 匙........ 次日太太怒氣衝衝的去找醫生 醫生看到太太來了 笑笑的問 :
怎麼? 我的藥很有效吧?! 太太 : wq$t#%&e%^$%w$! 太有效了!!! 害我先生....到現
在棺材還蓋不上去...
A man and his son were walking through a field, and saw two dogs mating.
The little boy asked his Dad what was happening. The Father replid,
"Well,son, they're making a puppy."
The following evening, the little boy was thirsty, so he went from his
bedto get a glass of water. Not being able to reach the
glasses, he walked unannounced into his parents bedroom, who were
makinglove in their usual missionary position.
Confused, the boy asked what were they doing.
The Dad responded very slowly and caringly to his impressionanle littleboy,
"Well, son, we are making you a little brother."
The little boy replied ,"Please turn Mom over, Dad, I'd rather have a
huppy!"